First Poster

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious The Mosterciful..

Only to Allah I lay upon my worries, my sorrows. Only He truly understands the content of my heart and only He truly listens.

While driving my car back from kl to temerloh this morning, my favourite song by native deen was on my car music player. It has been a long time since I last listen to this song, and listening to it as I drove nearer to the hospital makes me.feel totally helpless in this life. But only by believing in Him, gives me the strength to carry on this journey.

" when they ask about Me (oh muhammad), my servants I am near. Have no doubts about Me, and know I hear your prayer. Take one step towards me and I'll come running to you."

Being a first poster (meaning you are currently doing your first posting as houseman) is tough. You go to work everyday feeling really blurry about what you are supposed to do that day and feeling really anxious and scared at the same time thinking if you can manage to do your work properly without looking too blur to your disadvantage.

In the working world, in order for you to be able to survive you have to forget all you comfort zones. You have to have thick face and you have to have temporary amnesia but however still manage to recall everything about your patients. The above skills are required because having temporary amnesia and thick face will help you to endure all kind of scoldings from your superior. No matter how hard you got scolded you just need to swallow them down, hard and continue your work as if nothing has happened.

 

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Humbled and thankful

In the Name of Allah, The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

As the title implies, today I want to share with all readers of my blog, why I feel so thankful and humbled..

Being youngsters, we like to complaint and whine.. So, the other day as I was complaining to my aunt about how difficult it is working flexi hours, how the day offs are so short and etc..etc.. She asked me did i get any leave for the raya holiday? And i said i did.. i actually got 5 days off for the raya. But eversince i started working 2 months ago that's the only holiday i've forten so far.. She said that i am very lucky because when she was a houseman she didn't get any leave at all for the raya and she had ro on-call every other day.. At that moment something hits me.. how can i still be complaining when i'm in much, much better situations than 20 years ago.. Nowadays we have all sorts of technologies to help make our work more efficient, to help reduce our workload.. but why are we still complaining..? I guess the young generation nowadays (that would include me:p) are lacking stamina and independence.. we are born in the days of technologies where everything has been done for us. It's easy to take things for granted.. When I listen to the hardships that my aunt and uncle went through when they were doing housemanship, i realised what i'm going through is incomparable to their experiences. Thus, I am humbled and thankful.. I hope I could gain as much experience that I could throughout my housemanship. I pray to Allah to give me the strength and perseverance that I badly needed to help me become a better person and a better doctor, for my ummah.. InshaAllah..

Should a 13 year-old drive?

In the name of Allah The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

I've been working in the surgical department for about a month now and the numbers of motor vehicle accident really puzzles me.

Almost everyday we'll get patients coming in for MVA and the number increases more the closer we get to eidulfitri.

Yesterday, there was this 13 year old boy who was admitted due to rib fractures. He does not have a license and he was driving a motorbike when he got involved in the accident.

When I was helping my colleague adjusting his chest tube, his relative came in and asked about his condition. I told him that he is stable. And after that I couldn't restrain myself and ask the boy whether he has any driving licence or not when the truth is everybody knows that a 13 year old couldnt possibly has one because the law says you have to be at least 15 years old to obtain a motorbike licence. That question was only to make a point to the relative that allowing this boy to ride a motorbike when he does not have a licence is very irresponsible.

That boy is very lucky that all he gets is broken ribs. Imagine if his skull fractured, or he has bleeding in his brain or his spine got injured and he will be bedbound for the rest of his life?

From an active person, for just one irresponsible act he might not be able to fulfill his childhood dreams?

I've seen a patient who was involved in a motor vehicle accident and he is now bedbound, unable to speak and move and has to rely on other people to feed him and change his pampers. He is only 19 years old.

Eventhough maybe the situation of these two people are different, but I hope that people could see the consequences of their acts and start becoming more responsible in their life. When you are being reckless on the road, you are not putting yourself alone in danger but also the other road users.

Yes, accident happens. But we can prevent it..

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Tagging life

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

Well, to be honest this post has been long overdue. I've been off-tagged for my first posting since 2 weeks ago.

The day I was allowed to off-tag could be categorised into one of the happiest day of my life. I wished I could jump and hugged my boss for letting me finish my tagging duration in 2 weeks. I was very worried in the few days at the end of my tagging because we were supposedly to be assessed before we will be allowed to off-tag. The specialist in charge required us to know all the patients in the ward. Know all the diagnoses, investigations and progression of each patient. So i spent all my free time reading up all the cases in the ward and listening attentively during each rounds and pass-overs so that I would know and be updated with the progression of each patients.

To tell you the truth, 2 weeks of tagging is totally emotionally and physically draining. For 2 weeks I go to work at 6.30am. The earliest time I punched in was 6.15. I could not force myself to go earlier than that. But I know that there are others that come to work as early as 5.30am. And everyday for 2 weeks I work until 11 pm. There are no weekends off. I only get an off day after I've been working for 3 weeks straight.

Alhamdulillah, everyday each time after my prayers I would recite doa asking Allah to help me go through this, to help me endure and persevere and I believe eventhough the 2 weeks had neen tiring but He has helped me by giving me strength. Prayer times are the only time that I could rest my exhausted mind and emotion and recharge my motivation by connecting with Allah and telling Him about my troubles.

Though He never answer me back like humans would do, but my faith that He is taking care and looking after me makes me feel reassured and gives me the strength that I need.

The first lesson that I learn in order to survive the period of housemanship is that, you need to make sure that your spirituality is in check.

It's important to believe in yourself and your abilities but as humans we make mistakes and sometimes we are not at our best. But when we believe in Allah, believe that all things will only happen if He wills it, then our minds will be at ease because we know that He will take care of us.

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"Allah itu adalah seperti sangkaan hambaNya"